Sunday, 12 February 2012

A Confession

I don’t have a blow by blow recollection of the day I committed the sinful act of demeaning myself and deleting my blog, but yes it happened on one of those very frequent days when I had this fit of eccentricity, which is what I identify as one of my trademarks.

During the stint, I and my best friend were on one of our very common and usual charades, I kind of lost my nerve. Sat down to pour  my heart out on a lil piece of paper but couldn’t hold on to just one of those numerous thoughts parading my mind.  I lost my grip on the pen and  tossed it aside along with those maddening thoughts which possessed me like a demon and frightened me to death.  It is then that a person caught in the grip of emotions and passion decided to break free of that snare by strangling all the emotions of love and amiability that were ingrained inside of her heart.

Not only this, I thought that blogging is just not meant for me. During my very short time period in the blogosphere I came across so many creative people that this realization coupled with the  frustration of being incapable of coming out with something creative from what seemed like a very long time compelled me to surmise that I am not even a drop of the ocean of creativity flowing in here, it hit me like a thunderbolt. It ‘s like all the hell broke loose on me and took everything including my blog in its ugly claws,  just like the monster I often encounter in my dreams.

But I suppose this isn’t the way things are meant to end. I love my best friend more than anything/anyone else in this world and that shall be the reason, enough to forget everything that brought about this menace in the very first place. I didn’t even realize when we started talking to each other once again and everything that took a leave from my life along with her departure came back running to me along with her. Some relationships are very special, indeed.  Just a prick of mutual affection is what it takes to deflate the swollen pride and differences spreading their tentacles far and wide in any relationship . And that is exactly what we did. She visited me on the chocolate’s day with a Bournville  in hand and that small act of affection on her part had me all melted in a moment.

As per writing well is concerned, I understand that  it isn’t about  matching up to the level  of the ones  whose writing you think highly of, but  about  basking in the feeling  of joy and satisfaction that comes to you when you write your heart out. I started writing in the first place because it made me happy, but then ran astray I suppose, which is what I won’t let happen to me now. :)

P.S:  Any suggestions from the beautiful denizens of this world that could help me hone my writing skills are more than welcome. :)
P.P.S :  A mere thanks can’t express the overwhelming feeling of gratitude I hold , for your undying support  and friendship throughout  the rise and  fall of my life, Bhavya. I love you, Forever and Always...  :)

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